Yet, I think back to Tuesday night, as I laid in our bed, the room dark, the house quiet, with Brandon next to me...as I cried, I asked if we could just celebrate Mother's Day another time because "I'm just feeling like motherhood just isn't all it's cracked up to be." Yes, I said that. Yes, I feel that way sometimes. There's never a day that goes by that I don't think about how much I love my children. There's never a day that goes by that I'm not grateful God, in His grace, allowed me to be a mother.
But this morning, I wonder where is the outcry for sensitivity for those mothers whose dream of motherhood was lost in a diagnosis? Or for the mom who's strapped to the home caring for a child who can't care for themselves, yet is old enough to do so? Or the mom whose day is filled with tantrums, screaming, sensory overload, and erratic behavior? Or the mom who is having to feed her child trough a GI tube each day? Or the mom who has to fight tooth and nail for every little right that typical children don't have to fight for? Or the mom who's struggling with how to explain her child to the little league coach? Or the mom who attends more IEP meetings than nights out with her husband?
Or the mom who is just straight up is suffering in motherhood? Sound awful? I don't mean for it to, but, it's true. There are moms who woke up yesterday in love with her children, but, thought, man, this is not what I signed up for. There are moms who woke up yesterday, dragging because the weight of the responsibility is heavy.
The mom of a special needs child, that thinks her kid is crazy amazing with so much to offer a lost world, yet from time to time would love just a smidge of empathy. Not sympathy. We don't want you to feel sorry for us. Or wonder how you can avoid being us. This isn't our worst nightmare. We just want you to recognize it's hard. Raising special needs children IS harder than raising typical children. I can say this because I'm doing both.
I write this for them. Hoping maybe it
The other night, that Brandon of mine whispered, "We're celebrating Mother's Day, not because of the way you feel about motherhood in this moment but, because we're honoring you, as a mother...and you're a great one."
Weary momma that suffered a great loss, the loss of expectation, I get you.
Head over and see what Steph's saying about Mother's Day...http://solidjoysandlastingtreasures.com/2014/05/11/from-where-i-stand-motherhood/