At the same time, I need to be able to remove myself mentally from my job when given the opportunity and try more at relating to other people, their jobs, their lives, their work, etc. I realize I don't do a great job at that because I can't seem to separate myself from my family. While I should be putting God first, Brandon second, my kids third, it seems at times there isn't a ton of energy left for others. I need to be better at that. I'm going to work on it.
I'm blessed to be the wife to Brandon, the mother to Aubrey, Adelynne, and Nolan. Sometimes, although, I do feel as though Megan gets lost in the shuffle. It's no one's fault but my own. I've often said that while motherhood is one of the greatest experiences in life, it's also a life of never ending guilt. We always, as mothers seems to question each and every decision we make. Here's Megan's mind sometimes when it comes down to doing things for myself....
"I should go to the gym, but, I feel bad leaving."
"I desperately need a haircut, but, I feel guilty spending the money."
"I want to meet, (fill in the blank), for coffee (or dinner) but I feel bad leaving AND I feel guilty spending the money!"
I'm quite content being a mother for now, I feel God has called me to be their mother. I'm content. Sometimes I feel scattered, stretched, stressed and spent. Yet, I'm happy. I feel blessed. These thoughts aren't meant to sound like a pitty party for Megan. Matter fact, I hope this post conveys the opposite. I simply a busy mom, admitting that at times she's consumed in her hectic life, who needs to spend more time thinking of others.